Sunday, November 21, 2004

 Hey, do you wanna hear a fun story about how fucked i am? Okay! I have two papers due on November 30th, which are roughly 15 and 8 pages each. I haven't started writing and have done no research for either, and one of them i haven't even chosen a topic for. Writing takes me a really really long time, just trying to form sentences and translate my thoughts into words coherently. I am going home early on Wednesday, Thursday is Thanksgiving, and up until the 29th i will be spending all that time with my relatives who i rarely get to see. I will also be away from campus, meaning i won't be able to use the library that i need for, you know, all the books. Once i get back here, the papers will be due the next day. By that time, i'm pretty sure i'm going to want to shoot myself. Repeatedly. See, i could have started a month ago. I could have started last week, when i still had two weeks to do this stuff. But i waited. And waited. And kept waiting. I knew i had time! Oh ho ho, just one more day of dicking around, THEN i'll get to work! And now, well, now i'm really, really fucked. I do this exact same thing every time i have a big project, and i still never learn. I AM FUCKING RETARDED. So, yep! I'm gonna go die now. See you on the flip side.

- 4:16 AM

Thursday, November 18, 2004

 I saw a screening of Alexander tonight. Aside from being reeeeeeeeeally fucking long-winded and rather pretentious (but hey- epic), i kinda liked it. It was absolutely gorgeous to look at, the colors and the shots were amazing, so that could be influencing my opinion, uhm, a lot. And it's weird, some of it i thought was overdone or kind of lame, but there were some moments i thought were really good and sad. I don't know. And aww, Colin. The ridiculous blond hair didn't detract from the prettiness, and whoah, the kid who played young Alexander resembled him so much it freaked me out. The very worst thing about the showing was the fact that the entire (entire) theatre laughed at everything gay. EVERYTHING. Emotional scenes with pretty boys that i was trying to enjoy. It PISSED ME OFF, man. I hate college kids. I don't even consider myself a mature person, but seriously. Grow the fuck up.

We watched The Bad Seed in my violence class yesterday (psychopaths!), and it CREEPED me out. It was melodramatic and all (black and white '50s movie, though, so of course it was), but it was depressing. I had wanted to see it for a long time because i had flipped to TCM once and they were talking about the twist ending, which piqued my curiosity (yay twists!), and even though it wasn't mind-blowing or anything, it still kind of stuck with me. CREEPY.

Still haven't started my two huge papers that are due the 30th. Uhhh.

- 1:48 AM

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

 Ugh, i had been worried about ABC moving Alias to air after Lost on Wednesdays, because it seemed like that was the likeliest scenario. And now it's official. DUDE. YOU GUYS. I CAN'T HANDLE THAT. I just... can't. The two shows i'm most obsessive about, back to back? That is nooooooooooot goooooooooood. I can't have that much concentrated focus on a single night of the week. And having to switch gears from one big fandom to another that quickly SUCKS. Like, i'll be freaking out about what happened on Lost or in the preview for next week, and then OH NO IT'S ALIAS TIME! Do you SEE how bad that is? And i've only ever known Alias on Sunday nights, that'll be weird! It's been so strange for me looking forward to Wednesday nights so much, since i'm so used to wishing away my entire weekend for Sunday night to get here. The middle of the week seems to arrive faster, so at least that's pretty cool. But still- WEIRD. AND, since i've basically forsaken Alias for Lost right now, it'll be so awkward! Like having to live with your ex-boyfriend and your new boyfriend. "Oh, uh, hey Syd and Vaughn. How... are you guys? I was just hanging out with Jack and Kate... over here. You guys have met, right? Oh. Uhm. Okay. Well. I'll see you guys later, then. Yeah... bye." UNCOMFORTABLE!

Oh maaaaaaaaaaan. They did this on purpose. To drive me insane.

- 9:23 PM

Tuesday, November 09, 2004

 So, i had a painting due today (self-portrait, UGH), and i was kind of okay with how it turned out, but a lot of things were bugging the hell out of me and i didn't feel like trying to make it any better. But in the critique my teacher said it was the most successful piece in the class! Yaaaay. Uhm, even though she pretty much always likes my stuff. Dude, it's not my FAULT. I don't try to be a teacher's pet, it just happens sometimes. Anyway, it's still not that great that i don't have to change the painting, because now i have to do another one that's due Tuesday. :/

You know what was awesome, though? The TPM Vanity Fair was just sitting all wrinkled up on a table with a bunch of other junk magazines in the painting room, and i was like "!!!" and then i stole it. Dude, i got like, tons of the Ep2 magazines, but noooone of the Ep1 ones. And the Vanity Fair pictures are the BEST thing. And WHAT are the odds that i would get the chance to have that magazine again? Well, they're probably not that bad, but... WHAT are the odds that that magazine would just pop up in front of me as my Star Wars obsession is re-emerging? SLIM TO NONE. Anyway, yeah, that made my day very happy. I loooove shiny magazine photos, yes i do.

Annnnd, despite having two enormous papers of DEATH that i haven't started on both due Nov. 30 looming over me (uhh, shit), today was a decent day. Possibly because, thanks to Veteran's Day, i have a SIX-DAY WEEKEND. Ahahahaha SUCKERS. Also, i am ridiculously excited for tomorrow's Lost. Err, even though that's how i get every week! Hey.

- 9:35 PM

Monday, November 08, 2004

 Uhh, i'm totally gonna fail my online class. We were supposed to take a quiz that was up for a week, and i'm a week late and can't take it. But i SWEAR i checked the site (uh, once. very quickly.) when it was supposedly up, and i never saw it there. It would have been EASY, too! FUCK. Plus i've been late on a bunch of the assignments. With only two days of class a week now, you would think i would have gotten more diligent with this one. Buuuuuut no. It's too damn easy to completely ignore.

I just made brownies by myself for the first time ever. My roommates cook and bake, and i... don't, but they finally forced me to make something. And it was easy (i mean, i knew it would be, but i'm laaaaazy!) You guys, i'm practically a homemaker now.

I rewatched the Attack of the Clones trailers today. It was FUN. I reminisced on watching them the first billion times and not knowing what was going on and how awesome and exciting it was. I can't believe that was THREE YEARS AGO. Or, better yet, i can't believe TPM was SIX YEARS AGO. Ow, my brain.

- 10:56 PM

Saturday, November 06, 2004

 I saw The Incredibles! AWESOME. Soooooo... need to see it again. Not just because it was AWESOME and GORGEOUS and GREAT (although that's mainly it!), but also because i missed so much of what happened in the first half as i was preoccupied with just staring at everything. GAH. The HAIR, the backgrounds, the fabric, the textures, the colors... it's RIDICULOUS. And the story and characters were amazing, there was so much maturity- it was just a fucking great superhero movie. That's what you really have to love about Pixar- not only is the animation the best, but the story and humor are top-notch, too. You can tell there's absolute care and consideration put into everything. And... PRETTINESS.

Hey guess what else! STAR WARS TEASER. ASLJHDFLFYHGAKHGFJK Even though i saw it yesterday, of course, it's just that much more exciting on the big screen. Just... i just... yeah. Staaaaaaaar Waaaaaaaaaars. It's so insanely close already (OMFG MAY?!?!?!?!) and yet also tooooo far away. And in the lobby of the theatre they had a freakin' GINORMOUS WTF banner of the teaser poster, which i had to stop and stare at! Forever! And fantasize about having it on my bedroom wall! Oh, SW. The love.

- 1:08 AM

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

 We actually got let out of class way early last night, so i didn't end up missing any of the election coverage. Which made me happy! Except for the part where i was depressed and pissed off most of the time i was watching it (The Daily Show and the blue states- the only beacons of happy goodness). And i stayed up until they had mostly called it, and i kind of... well, i cried. It just astounds me that there are so many people who want Bush for another term. That honestly think he did a good job and want MORE OF THE SAME. I had felt so hopeful and optimistic, that we could make this change happen, and everywhere i looked there were more people who were being vocal about the same things i believed. But apparently i overestimated how many of those people there actually were. And all that effort, all the rallying and speaking out and calling for change and wailing and gnashing of teeth, it was all for nothing. My vote probably hasn't even been counted yet. I was so proud, and i felt so important, and it didn't make a goddamn difference. Honestly, i hate Bush. I hate that smug, evil bastard, and i don't want to have to stare at his smirking, ugly, monkey face for another four years. I don't want to have to worry so much about civil liberties being taken away and gay rights and women's rights and war-mongering and people without jobs and the entire world hating us. But then, the entire world has a point. The majority of America is fucking stupid.

- 1:48 PM

 FUCK.

- 1:06 AM